Masculine and feminine energy are like a fire. if you can master your masculine energy you can control your fire and use it as a light but if lose control of your fire, you can burn everything down.
The only way to master your masculine energy is with discipline. You need to give yourself instructions and then follow your instructions. It takes discipline to follow your own lead.
Once she notices that you have mastered your energy, her energy will yield to you with very little effort from you.